Your body believes everything that you say. Levine
What kind of mental strategy most improved a person's performance when throwing darts. Masciana asked his dart-players to try everything from mental imagery (visualizing hitting the target) to Zen meditation (clearing the mind of extraneous thoughts). Masciana discovered that positive self-talk was the best technique for improving the dart thrower's ability to hit the target. This kind of positive self-talk is very simple - it consists of talking to oneself in a confident, reassuring, positive, friendly way. Surprisingly, positive self-talk works better than anything else! Source
The ABC of self-talk: A is for the activating situation when you began to feel rotten. B for the beliefs and assumptions you make about that situation and C for the consequences of those beliefs, feelings and behaviours.
More on this topic at Breast Health Online and at Reach Out.
However: smile or die is a tyranny of positive thinking
Barbara Ehrenreich talks about that tyranny in this 35 minute video covering the spread of positive thinking.
There is no kind of problem or obstacle for which positive thinking or a positive attitude has not been
proposed as a cure. Having trouble finding a mate? Nothing is more attractive to potential suitors than a positive attitude, or more repellent than a negative one. Need money? Wealth is one of the principal goals of positive thinking. There are hundreds of self-help books expounding on how positive thinking can "attract" money – a method supposedly so reliable that you are encouraged to begin spending it now. Practical problems such as low wages and unemployment are mentioned only as potential "excuses". The real obstacle lies in your mind.
People who had been laid off from their jobs and were spiraling down toward poverty were told to see their condition as an "opportunity" to be embraced. Here, too, the promised outcome was a kind of "cure": by being positive, a person might not only feel better during his or her job search, but actually bring it to a faster, happier conclusion. Source
All this hype claiming that if you don't have a positive attitude and that if you get depressed you are making your tumor grow faster invalidates people's natural and understandable reactions to a threat to their lives... a refrain I often hear from people with cancer: the notion that feeling sad, scared, upset, or angry is unacceptable and that emotions can somehow make your tumor grow. And the sense that if the person is not in control on the emotional plane all the time, the battle against the disease will be lost. Source
Although research on the effects of finding benefits in traumas remain inconsistent a 2004 study found that women who perceive more benefits (positive thinking) from their cancer tend to face a poorer quality of life, including worse mental functioning, compared with women who do not perceive benefits from their diagnoses. Women who perceived such benefits as closer relationships, greater appreciation of life and a change in life priorities (as a result of their cancer) were found to have poorer mental health. Source
A policy of no negative thoughts is a brutal tyranny
Try to stop yourself think of a flying pink elephant. The more we oppose negative thoughts the more likely they are to persist. Better to befriend them as a story you tell your self for example, 'ah there's that old story about how I'm never going to be good enough'. More on mindfulness practices on Russ Harris' site: the happiness trap. I recommend his Acceptance and Commitment workshops.
Article 1
112 Examples of negative self-talk
I have copied below for those in rural and remote Canada and Australia with poor internet access.
Retrieved 25/05/05 from http://www.extramarital-affairs.com/article_negtalk.html
1 I feel burned out.
2 I’m tired.
3 What’s the use?
4 I’m on a treadmill.
5 I never have any fun.
6 I can’t seem to get ahead.
7 Every day it’s the same.
8 I don’t feel good.
9 I’m not in control of my life.
10 I feel so down all the time.
11 I can’t get caught up.
12 I’m all stressed out.
13 Things just aren’t working right.
14 I’ve got too much on my plate.
15 I feel overwhelmed
16 Nobody cares. Why bother?
17 His bad mood made me feel low.
18 Nobody else does. Why should I?
19 It just can’t be done.
20 Nothing ever works out for me.
21 It’s too hard.
22 I can’t handle this.
23 I’m so stupid.
24 I’m so depressed.
25 It’s not fair.
26 The situation is hopeless.
27 I’m disgusted.
28 It’s so frustrating.
29 There aren’t enough hours in the day.
30 I can’t seem to get rested.
31 It’s just my usual bad luck.
32 Why does it always happen to me?
33 What else can I expect?
34 I’m bored.
35 That doesn’t work in my area.
36 Things are great - so look out.
37 That’s just the way I am.
38 I just never can remember.
39 Others can do it, why can’t I?
40 I’m so sick of it all.
41 I don’t want to do it.
42 I try, but it never works.
43 You want this when?
44 I hate my life.
45 “!*&#!”
46 I should have
47 I can’t until
48 If only I had
49 My work is so repetitious.
50 No one notices my good work.
51 It’s hard to be positive.
52 That’s not my job.
53 It just doesn’t matter.
54 I never seem to get things done.
55 I can’t handle it any more.
56 Same old stuff-different day.
57 What I do is never good enough.
58 I don’t feel like doing anything.
59 I wish I didn’t have to get up.
60 Why must I do everything?
61 My hair looks awful.
62 There’s too much to do.
63 I’m worn out.
64 Something always goes wrong.
65 Life’s not fair.
66 I’m in a bad mood.
67 I’m always short of money.
68 If only I didn’t have staff problems.
69 There’s never enough to go around.
70 I tried that and it didn’t work.
71 How can I when
72 My life’s such a mess.
73 I’m lucky, but its all bad.
74 That’s too hard to do.
75 I’m just not that smart.
76 I can’t get out of this slump.
77 I’m not qualified.
78 I’m tired of doing the same thing.
79 This is just not my day.
80 It’s a waste of time.
81 I can’t get organized.
82 I don’t have patience.
83 I don’t have energy.
84 I don’t have the ability.
85 I can’t get ready on time.
86 I don’t know what I want
87 I look terrible.
88 I need a vacation.
89 I wish I didn’t have to go to work.
90 I hate change.
91 When it rains, it pours.
92 Bad things come in three’s.
93 I cant seem to please anyone
94 I’m unhappy.
95 I can’t deal with complaints.
96 Why bother?
97 I deserve these bad feelings.
98 The situation is hopeless.
99 If only he/she would
100 How could he/she do that to me?
101 Why doesn’t he/she
102 I don’t feel like doing anything.
103 I’ll never get over this feeling of...
104 I feel powerless and it scares me.
105 I try but it doesn’t work out.
106 Ill never find the right partner.
107 I’m so afraid I’ll drink again
108 I’m afraid I’ll use pills again.
109 I feel so alone.
110 I’m afraid of being alone.
111 His bad moods bring me down.
112 I deserve to suffer.